You spend time picking the invite that will set the scene for your wedding, you carefully plan the invite wording to respect your family and illustrate your love and joy, you put in the time gathering addresses. After all of this effort, it would really be a shame to spoil it all by addressing the invites incorrectly... There is something so annoying about receiving poorly addressed mail - for example when my name is listed merely as a Mrs. next to my husband's full name. Seriously - I may be married, but I am still a separate person with my own name!
There are a few etiquette rules that you should keep in mind when addressing your invites (or any mail for that matter). Firstly, make sure that you know peoples name, the correct spelling, their preferred title i.e. Mrs., Ms., Dr. (they have worked hard for that 'Dr.', so you should use it!) etc. Don't assume a married woman has taken her husband's name - take the time to find out. Now for the nitty gritty.
For couples that don't share the last name (married or unmarried):
Ms. Jane Smith
Mr. Jo Jones
or
Mrs. Jane Smith-Jones
Mr. Jo Jones
Or if you're looking for something less formal:
Jane Smith
Jo Jones
The rules: her name goes 1st, and all invitees should be listed. It's a technicality, but if a married woman doesn't take her husband's surname she is actually a 'Ms.'. However, if she chooses to call herself a Mrs. please respect that. Names are ideally on separate lines but when space is an issue they can appear on the same line.
For couples that share that share the same last name:
Mr. and Mrs. Smith
or
Mr. and Mrs. Jo and Jane Smith
If your looking for something less formal:
Jo and Jane Smith
The rules, his name goes 1st, all invitees should be listed (including children). If she has taken her husband's name she is a 'Mrs.'. However if she chooses to call herself a Ms. please respect that.
P.S. All the same rules apply for same sex couples!
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